Another argument could be heard coming from the couple next door. This time, the wife was heard saying that the husband never listens. Since this was the norm from that home, the neighbours no longer called the authorities on them.
“What were you thinking when I told you that my boss’s leaving party was tonight?” shouted the wife. “Of course, you were too engrossed in your lewd telephone chats with your numerous girlfriends to hear me speak!”
Something like the sound of a slap reached us followed immediately by a scream from the woman. To cut a long story short, she ended up in the hospital with several broken body parts. That marriage is over now.
The art of listening is a colossal part of the communication process among human beings. To be able to interact using our words with others is one distinctive feature unique to us. How people in various relationships allow themselves to cease communicating and still expect the relationship to succeed amazes me!
Wherever people are found, there must be some form of exchange of ideas, views and thoughts. It is mostly by such interactions that proper harmony can be established in the relationship. But what we see, some of the time, is situations where there is complete breakdown of communication. There could be a host of reasons for this. However, chief among them is the inability or unwillingness of people involved to listen to themselves.
Given that lots of speaking is presumed to occur, there is no corresponding response or reaction that indicates adequate listening has taken place. This could be one of the many reasons why too many relationships have broken down over the years.
Why is it difficult sometimes for people to listen, especially to those closest to them? Could it be distraction, fed up with hearing the same thing or nothing at all, inability to do so, not interested in what is being said, not knowing how to react/respond, feeling superior or inferior, poor health, lack of discipline, culture, upbringing, social status, immaturity, past experiences, being too busy/defensive/impatient or just to punish the other party? I honestly cannot say what leads to listening not taking place in different relationships.
I do know that listening constitutes an integral part of all relationships. When it is abused or not applied at all or partially done, a host of negative outcomes are the result. A situation where a husband speaks but the wife hears something else (and vice versa) is purely personal decision. You will hear what you decide to listen to. There is no point in going into any form of affair with others if we will not invest our time to carefully listen so we can hear what they have got to say.
It is out of order to pick and choose when we listen to the people we claim to love or are important in our lives. Even in the animal kingdom, listening is one major method by which those lesser animals ensure their continued survival in the wild. They understand very well that should they miss any signal of imminent dangers, that would mean becoming breakfast, dinner, lunch or a snack to a predator. As a result, they constantly have their ears to the ground. Why then do human beings not apply this life skill to be worthy winners in their affiliations with one another?
Listen. To listen, I mean really listening can spare the world so much of the ruined relationships that have happened to individuals, families and society. Some of the only requirements for good listening are discipline, willingness and patience to listen, as well as the ability to fully hear what was said. When these are implemented, the chances are that many associations will begin to heal, flourish and grow beyond expectations.
Who is our best example at listening but Christ Jesus? He spent thirty years of His life in obscurity probably listening to important instructions on how to fulfill what destiny had for Him. Everyone is urged to put on our listening hats more often. I think one of the reasons we have two ears is that we listened twice as much as we spoke. May we learn from our experiences to remedy what damage that have altered out relationships as we become disciplined, willing and patient to hear what is being said to us. Listen.
I salute you for pausing by my blog today. Enjoy God’s peace, love and joy in your life and family. Proverbs 1:5 A wise person will listen…
© Jouyoz December 2020